Someone watching?
Hit the ESC key at any time to hide this site. Privacy Tips
Call 1-844-762-8483
7NATIVE

Or Text 24/7

If you send a text, you will immediately receive a response notification that you will be texted back from a secondary number.
Standard text rates may apply.
Your information will be kept anonymous and confidential.

Domestic Violence Myths

There are a lot of commonly held beliefs about domestic violence that can harm victims and keep people from seeking help. StrongHearts Native Helpline unravels some of the myths surrounding domestic violence and sheds light into the darkness of intimate partner violence.

Domestic Violence is a private family matter: FICTION

When domestic violence becomes rampant in any community, it is no longer just a family matter. Using violence and coercion against an intimate partner is a violation of human rights and a serious global health issue ( Guruge, 2012 ); and, intimate partner violence (IPV) is one of the most prevalent types of violence against women.

In Indian Country, a survey of intimate partners revealed that:

  • More than 56 percent had experienced sexual violence
  • More than 55 percent had experienced intimate partner violence

What’s worse, perpetrators are disproportionately interracial (a partner who was not American Indian or Alaska Native) as compared to intraracial (a partner who is American Indian or Alaska Native).

  • 97 percent of female victims and 90 percent of male victims experienced violence at the hands of at least one interracial (non-Native perpetrator) in their lifetime.
  • 35 percent of female victims and 33 percent of male victims have experienced intraracial (AIAN perpetrator) violence in their lifetime.

Domestic violence has a lasting effect on children: FACT

Children who witness and experience domestic violence may experience ongoing effects of trauma throughout their lives. In fact, studies have shown that babies of abused pregnant mothers can be born exhibiting symptoms of depression, irritability and difficulty expressing affection.
  • The rates of pregnant mothers being abused are not short on numbers. In the U.S. alone 300,000 pregnant mothers report abuse annually.
  • Children exposed to violence can suffer long term effects of trauma and are more likely to use violence against others.
  • The rate of PTSD for Native American children is three times the national average.
  • Exposure to trauma is a common thread to over-representation in juvenile justice systems.

Most of the time, domestic violence is not really that serious: FICTION

Domestic violence is an illegal act in the U.S. and is considered a crime with serious repercussions. Although there are aspects of domestic violence (example: emotional, psychological, spiritual abuse) that may not be considered criminal in a legal sense, that does not diminish the serious and long-lasting effects of physical, emotional and spiritual abuse. Each and every act of domestic violence must be taken seriously.

A victim can easily leave an abusive partner. Leaving is the safest option: FICTION

The most dangerous time for a victim is when they attempt to leave the relationship, or when the abuser discovers that they have made plans to leave. Fear, lack of safe options, and the inability to survive economically prevent many victims from leaving abusive relationships. Threats of harm, including death to the victim, children and pets, keep many battered people trapped in abusive situations. Other reasons a victim stays with an abusive partner include:

  • Love: the victim has love for their abusive partner
  • Family: wanting to maintain harmony within the family
  • Community: escaping the abuse can mean leaving their tribal community or concerns over what community members will think if they found out about the abuse
  • Low Self-Esteem: makes excuses for abuser’s behavior, blames self for the abuse, or feels hopeless
  • Denial/Shame: doesn’t want to admit or is embarrassed that they’re in an abusive relationship
  • Lack of finances or resources: leaving an abusive partner may mean leaving behind financial resources and many basic human needs.

Anger management programs are briefer, more cost-effective than a certified batterer intervention program: FICTION

Domestic violence is not an anger management problem. Additionally, anger management programs fall short of addressing the deeply-rooted issues associated with domestic and dating violence and therefore are ineffective. Batterer Intervention Programs (BIP) are specifically designed to meet the needs of batterers. Whether voluntarily or under court order—the BIP’s are set up to educate and rehabilitate the abusive partner. The goal of BIPs is to change offender thinking and behavior with the result that offenders are held accountable, victim safety enhanced and decrease the likelihood of further violence.

Domestic and sexual violence helplines and programs are only for women: FICTION

Anyone can be a victim of domestic violence. Like many programs, StrongHearts Native Helpline is for all Native American and Alaska Natives impacted by domestic or sexual violence including males, two-spirit, nonbinary, etc.

supportive family supportive family

We understand.

Get Help

More Articles About domestic violence

Elders Often Suffer Abuse In Silence

"It is unacceptable when elders suffer abuse and neglect at the hands of those who should protect them." ~Lori Jump, CEO, StrongHearts Native Helpline.

Featured Article
Colonization and Domestic Violence

Uncover the roots of Native American domestic, dating and sexual violence.

Featured Article
How Do You Heal?
During Domestic Violence Awareness Month, StrongHearts Native Helpline is dedicated to eradicating domestic and sexual violence by utilizing a core...
Featured Article
Elders and Domestic Violence

Explore how the tactics of intimate partner violence for older adults may look different than other age groups.

Am I being abused?

List of behaviors that are abusive.

Escalation of Abuse

In most abusive relationships the tactics of an abusive partner will escalate over time.

Safety During a Violent Encounter

If a violent encounter seems imminent and unavoidable, there are a few options to consider to keep you safe.

Pet Abuse

Beloved pets can be used to exert power and control over a victim-survivor.

5 Types of DV that are often Overlooked

Abuse isn't always physical. Read more about the different types of abuse.

What is Domestic Violence?

There are several types of abuse. People in abusive relationships often experience more than one type of abuse.

Featured Article
Who can be Abused?

Domestic violence can happen to anyone regardless of age, disability, religion, sex, sexual orientation, gender identity or economic background.

Why Do People Abuse?

Abusive people think they have the right to control and restrict their partners.

Domestic Violence and Firearms

Anyone can be in serious danger if their abusive partner has a gun.

Alcohol and Abuse

Using alcohol can strain a relationship but it is not the cause of domestic violence.

The Myth of Mutual Abuse

Read Michelle’s story to learn how a sense of false responsibility can impact a victim-survivor.

Mutual Abuse Is A Fallacy

Taking responsibility for your behavior is the first step. Change is possible, however, requires a deep commitment which many find challenging.

PTSD Effects on Children Who Witness Domestic Violence

For Native American children who are exposed to domestic violence or even the threat of violence/abuse, there is an increased risk of psychological, social, emotional and behavioral problems.

Domestic Violence and Native Americans with Disabilities

An often overlooked group of Native American victim-survivors of domestic violence are those with disabilities.

Creating a Separation Plan and Preparedness Kit

Store the preparedness kit outside of the home either with a trusted neighbor, friend or relative or keep it in a secret location where you can safely retrieve it.

Suicide and Domestic Violence

A victim-survivor can develop mental health issues like depression over the course of the relationship, putting them at greater risk for suicide.

Pregnancy and Domestic Violence

Pregnancy can be a dangerous time for pregnant people in abusive relationships, putting them and their unborn child at heightened risk.

Holiday Financial Abuse

Around the holidays, financial abuse may look a little different. The additional stress of the holidays may affect your decisions. Financial abuse is just one tactic of domestic violence.

How will the expansion of 5G impact Native American and Alaska Native domestic violence victims?

The end of 3G will widen the gap between higher-income and low-income individuals who can’t afford the upgrade to 5G compatible devices and other smart 5G technology.

Domestic Violence and Strangulation

Strangulation is one of the most serious forms of physical abuse.